Wills and Kate: The Movie

Lifetime (television for women) has a movie coming out about the courtship of Prince William and Princess Bikini. This has to be first biographical movie about two people who have accomplished nothing in life. Are people actually going to watch it? Oh wow, he met her in class, took her to one of his castles, and she fell in love with him. Borrrrrrrrrrrrrrring.

The people at Spike TV need to put together a Keith Stone romance movie, in which Keith, played by Justin Long, takes his girl, played by Emma Roberts, out for pizza and some sloppy making out at Off the Wagon on MacDougal St. Then, he fails to return any of her text messages and watches basketball with his buddies the next weekend. Art imitating life, my friends. Sign me up for an Emmy.